Honor the Disabled

A few weeks ago I volunteered to be one of the ushers for my church’s disability service. For disabled people who haven’t been baptized, catechism and holy communion, this was the first time that they experienced the processions. The event also invited some important people such as the church regional leaders and Indonesia’s Social Minister. More information about the event is here. What I will write is about how I personally felt while ushering them. 

Spiritual services for disabled people are not that popular as a matter of fact here in my region. Even this event was held partly because a couple of our church leaders’ children are disabled, too. Nevertheless, our church’s attention to disabled people has been there since it’s been established. So I was quite excited to witness the phenomenon of Batak families taking care of disabled people. 

My assumption was that Batak families might have significantly more difficulties in showing their affection through their words and gestures to their disabled family members since the emotion department is sort of the weakest amongst us Bataknese. When I talked to a mother of a daughter who’s mute and deaf, apparently the challenge is more than that. She isn’t proficient in using sign language, resulting in arduous communication between both of them. Another mother admitted that the toughest moments for her were calming her down-syndrome son whenever he acts out. 

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On the positive side, both moms were totally grateful for this service that they had been dreaming of and praying for so long. They said there was never a time for their children to celebrate their faith, regardless of the fact that they might not be intelligently capable to participate. However, humans are all loved equally by Him— we’re all the same in the eyes of God. 

When Ibu Risma, the Social Minister was about to give her speech after the service, I met this beautiful teenage girl. Her name is Putri Aritonang from HKBP Cikarang. She’s suffered from cerebral palsy ever since she had a car accident with her mom who did not make it. So she got to survive with her dad and younger brother. Her dad repairs tires for a living. My encounter with her was a lot of things. I felt sad looking at her condition, to begin with. Her family can not afford a proper wheelchair or medications for her, either. I didn’t know how to interact with her at first, but I tried mimicking ridiculous faces or poses as if I was teasing a baby. Suddenly, she started to laugh. I kept doing it until she laughed so hard. Then I talked to her the way I talked with a baby. I got better at communicating with her. 

This is Putri. Look at her smile! 🙂

Then I held her hand and smiled, looking at her eyes. Gosh, her sparing gaze came through my soul. It seems like she never had that touch before from her mom? I have no idea at all. But I can feel how she was longing for that kind of physical affection from her stare. OH MAN, I can still imagine it. 

I did not interact much with her father; yet looking at his facial expression, I suppose he is tired. However, I did chat with her brother who is still in elementary school. I asked him how he feels about his sister. He said it was just the same, just like normal. Then I followed up, “Have you ever felt sad?” to which he replied, “She was doing just fine, always spending time with the cellphones.” Then I thought to myself, “What do I expect from a fifth-grader?” after he told me that one thing that pissed him off frequently is his father rarely gives him pocket money.

The interesting part is when it is announced that the children with cerebral palsy will get the new tech-adjusted wheelchair and some cash. The brother suddenly told Putri, “See, you got a new wheelchair and lots of money!!” snarkily. I could sense some envy there, so I told him that he also has a complete body that allows him to do whatever he wants to do, unlike his sister. He should be grateful for that. We all should.

Well apparently, from what I saw, the wheelchair had not been through quality control. The people from the Ministry of Social were lost on how to adjust the wheelchair when they put Putri on it and one of the parts was falling out. It was all for show, I guess. I wish they brought the chair’s designer who really understands how the chair works for disabled people, instead of the bosses. 

Ibu Risma giving a speech.

Anyhow, I felt SO FULL OF LOVE after the event. Not only from the event participants but also from my fellow ushers. I was (certainly) the oldest, so sharing with them really embraces the youthfulness in me.

USher!

I am grateful. I hope this service becomes regular and more people can be involved as volunteers. 

To fellow millennials out there: keep fighting and believing

Now that I have time to write on my blog – I thought it’d be interesting to share about this thing that bugs millennials these days: work and society.

A lil’ bit of intro, while cleaning my dusty book shelves I went through some of my old paperworks when I studied at the US (2013). Of course I paid most attention to the one that scored the best, you know, just wanna reminisce those good ole days.

It was a mid – exam for Work and Society course. Four short essay questions and I got to pick one. It was like this:

Your friend Anna graduated from JMU five years ago. She calls you one night this week because she heard that you were taking a class on sociology of work. She is distraught and disappointed. She thought by now she would be making good money (given that she has a college degree). She thought she would be in a middle management position, for instance. Instead she feels adrift – she has had three jobs much too boring, too repetitive, or below her skill level (so she keeps quitting them after a while and looking for the right job). On the other hand she doesn’t know what she is really interested in, or what it takes to be successful in a career. Using concepts from the book [Outlier by Malcolm Gladwell], how would you advise her?

This question triggered me the most because at that moment I thought I’d be Anna in two or three years later after I graduated. I tried my best to be a wise friend for Anna. This is what I wrote.

Note: sentences in red are my Professor’s comments. He’s so dope, btw.

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As a good friend of Anna, I would feel terrified to say/admit that the moment she graduated, the Great Recession was still going on. The global economy was at its lowest point, the unemployment rates were rising at the very high stake. There were job losses everywhere and only a few jobs were available, not to mention the middle management that she seek [True sensible place to start]. But the good news is, she needed not to be worried because she’d still be successful if she knew”the game.”

First of all, I’d change her mindset that college degree was going to guarantee her good money. It was herself that counts, not her degree [Good point]. I’d also do my free lecture for her on how intelligence – as in IQ – would not give the stamp of success. Indeed, Gladwell concedes that the higher IQ that we have, the more likely we attend higher education, gain much knowledge, and get successful career. But it’s only happened in certain times. Once you get the IQ of 120, that’s already sufficient. If you get higher, it will not translate into a measurable real-world advantage [Exactly]. I’d introduce her to my mentors whose IQ were on average but made it into successful persons. There are these non – cognitive skills that outweigh those cognitive ones. I would ask her if she’s attained them in college years or not:

• Persistence (to be determined)
• Self – control (to be able to resist any temptation)
• Conscience (to be able to evaluate)
• Curiosity (to always improve)
• Self – confidence (to believe in herself)
• Grit (to be able to continue although you’re fed up already)

If she asked my mentors about what had made them successful, probably IQ/degree would be their last answers. They would come up with those skills first.

Next, I’d made an analogy of her life (to make her not bored of my advices) into “an arrow that doesn’t have any targets.” [Great image] The arrow doesn’t know where to go. Anna had to start digging herself about what she was really interested in. Make a direction, at least. After that, she should master it. I’d tell her to practice what she was passionate about for 10,000 hours [Practicing your passion has to be practical – practice something that has a pay off]. But to motivate her, I’d tell her the success stories of Bill Gates, Bill Joy, the Beatles, and Thomas Edison who had the total (or more than) 10,000 hours practice and became successful. Even Mozart finally composed his masterpiece in the age of 40. Why 10,000 hours? Because those numbers will exercise her self – drive, persistence, and all the non – cognitive skills that she had [Precisely]. If she lost track, I’d remind her on her passion. I’d always stress the passion or interest thing because that’s what makes all the hard works meaningful [True]. I’d doubt that she’s willing to work her ass off if she didn’t find it meaningful. That’s what matters.

I’d tell her to get jobs that would bring her to the higher level, not jobs that would pay her high at the moment [Another way to say this is to suggest that she think long – term; get jobs that have better opportunities for later promotions]. I’d show her the comparison of those McD employees with those account directors at Arc Worldwide. No matter how great those employees in frying the hams, they would still get the same salary; whereas those directors who were able to deal with top – notch CEOs would get more and more salary. If she found her previous jobs were boring and repetitive, I’d suggest her to take the latter jobs. It’d bring her to the whole different level [Good plan… or tell her to do the boring job well so she can get a promotion to a better job].

On the “how to be successful in a career,” I’d advise her to cultivate her practical intelligence. I’d explain how PI is very different from IQ. It’s not innate, programmed, or designed. It can be developed by interacting with people around her. It’d build her character into someone who could read what other people think, convince people on her arguments, and execute her ideas in the right timing. PI would allow her to come up with something that people never think of, it cultivates her creativity. And I bet she’d be very happy to know that it’s what the companies are looking for. If she was able to manage people and sell her ideas in the right timing, she’d be successful. And I’d also tell her to practice her PI in her 10,000 hours. To sum up, all she needed was the right timing and preparation.

Lastly, I’d remind her that this whole thing would take a long, long time. There’s no shortcuts. No excuses. However, she’d snatch her long – term achievement in the end. Before I left her, I’d give this quote from Carl Rogers that says, “Life is a process, it is not about being in a great state. It is all about your directions, not destinations.” [Great quote] I’d also pray for her that God would grant her opportunities.

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Looking at how far I’ve come at this point – meaningful work has crossed my mind on one of those days, same with my friends and families. On one side, there’s this long standing “passion” principle that people still hold on to in order to find their true happiness regardless how harsh reality has taught them. On the other side, a stride of people have come up with this “anti – passion” spirit that I find miserable as well as if life’s inflated in their own struggle. Not to mention this reality check article that says we, millennials, are mostly unhappy because we just demand too much from the reality – which I partly agree.

My own lady brain thinks that despite of the complex discourse, there is still much time to reflect. To finally get to the point where we realize that life is a process – of anything. Process of finding our true happiness; struggling for financial security from our job; being proud of our achievements at work and wanting more; supporting others for the same reason we support ourselves, and of course the process of appreciating ourselves to get through all this. The advice I gave to Anna was pretty on point, and simple. But boy do I struggle a lot to be able to consistently apply it myself. Anyhow, fellow dream chasers, keep on believing and fighting. I know the digital-era that we live in has pressured us to be “more” than others in a lightning pace and full exposure. But it’s all about being the betterment of yourself, not others. So do not ever worry (or even envy) about the other’s highlight reel since you can only enjoy and live your own. Also, I’d say it once again,

” […] this whole thing would take a long, long time. There’s no shortcuts. No excuses. However, she’d snatch her long – term achievement in the end.”

You’d say that to yourself, then you be lucky that you be the wise friend of yourself.

Anna and I are gonna get drink tonight, you wanna come?

Entrepreneurship: Pave Your Way to Become a Decent Citizen

What do you have in mind when you hear the word entrepreneur? Is it Diane Hendricks, Jin Sook Chang, Martine Rothblatt, etc? (Yes, they’re all women. And yes, they’re all some of the richest woman entrepreneur worldwide). Or is it your neighbor who has been struggling with his/her own internet café?

Either way, you’re on the right path. Owning your own business is a culture that’s been cultivated in recent years. According to Global Entrepreneurship Monitor (Babson College), the total entrepreneurial activity worldwide has shown a steady increase in general across all different economic levels despite a worldwide economic struggle over the past few years, with mixed indicators in many countries. However, compared to the number of other jobs, people who own their own business are still way too low.

What do you do?

Is this something we should be concerned? If you’re living in a developing country, you should; and if you’re living in a developed country, you should too. Why? This framework that I took from this trusted research paper might be able to explain.

Entrepreneurship –> jobs creation –> economic growth

It’s pretty easy to understand actually. First thing you need to understand is that—according to the authors—the history of the rise and fall of nations has shown that cultural vitality, thriving sciences and high tide in entrepreneurship often coincide. It makes so much sense. To be an entrepreneur isn’t as easy and quick as you think. Therefore, when you make it, I think you’ll get this sense of self-reliance that you never know before. You become braver, tougher, more optimistic, even stronger. Or you might become more selfish, ambitious, arrogant, even skinnier (hint: Apple’s Steve Jobs). Whatever that is, you become a much more productive citizen for your country because with all the perseverance you have (I intentionally don’t say talent because you can always be talented when you’re persevered), you turn all those ideas into actions.

Actions lead to new firms or start-ups which create the competitiveness in market by forcing the entrepreneurs to always innovate to be able to avoid the obsolesce. Competitiveness in the national level will then increase the economic growth as the jobs are created sustainably. According to most of economics theories, job creations will generate economic growth.

There you go, we the tiny human being can actually benefit the country.

How about Indonesia? How are we doing for entrepreneurship? Here’s a glance of GEM’s 2013 report on one of the world’s fastest growing economies:

The level of early-stage entrepreneurial activity (TEA) in Indonesia is high; furthermore, it is notable that both men and women are equally likely to be engaged in TEA.

The average entrepreneur in Indonesia has at least secondary education, income in the low to middle range, either male or female, working mostly in the trading and services sector.

Enablers and Constraints: The biggest enabler is the dynamic internal market; the main constraint is a lack of government support for entrepreneurial programs.

Initiatives Supporting Entrepreneurship: Many policies and programs have been initiated to enhance entrepreneurship; however those are led by different agencies or ministries, and there is a lack of communication and coordination, which reduces their impact.

Challenges for the Future: Indonesia needs to increase innovation and maintain the sustainability of its businesses. Government support for entrepreneurs is also in need of improvement, with regard to both regulation and programs. Finally, the sharing of new know-how and technologies (R&D transfer) within Indonesia’s entrepreneurship ecosystem must be improved.

So, amongst any other countries, Indonesia has a considerably high early-stage entrepreneurial activity with low fear of failure. Not bad! (Although we actually need many more entrepreneurs)

I personally prefer having my own business someday (hopefully) to contribute to the nation rather than be involved in the government system. It’s just not in my blood. Knowing that Indonesia’s on the rise in terms of entrepreneurship activities, I’m sure that I’m on the right track. Even more so, my dear friend that I met in USA two years ago just made it clearer that a dream is the leap of faith that we need.

I met Ridwan when I was looking for a place to stay before my semester at James Madison University, Virginia, started. Long story short, I got another place to stay, but we became friends since then because he was the only one from Indonesia who e-mailed me back. Then I got to know him and his incredible cooking skills and very passionate working attitude. He always cooked me delicious food whenever I visited, also cured my craving for Indonesian food. He’s just the best. And when I knew he won one of the local food business competition, I just thought that he could be the great example of how an ordinary person who has been working for half of his life can still make his dream come true.

Me and Ridwan. Aren’t we cute?

All the Indonesian food we cooked together to cure our cravings. (left: stir-fried green beans with tempeh; up: YUMMY Indonesian chili sauce; right: fried salted fish; down: lalapan or just fresh vegetables)

Here’s our Q&A:

First of all, congratulations for winning the What’s Cooking Competition, tell us more about it!

First of all, thank you so much. It was back in September 2014; there was an article in local newspaper about What’s Cooking.  It is about food related business concept competition, the class/workshop took about 6 months from the beginning, concept stage until the final pitch competition stage. We met in the class room at least once or twice a month. More info can be found here.

After we attended that meeting, my partner and I were interested since we do have a plan to open small café in the future. This is great opportunity for learning. Our first intention was to learn how to open a small business, we never thought about winning this competition. I agree with the purpose of this program: everyone is a winner after leaving this program.

I also let the participants and speakers tasted my food, but it’s not the main criteria for the judges. It is about concept, what type of food business, menu, target market, etc.

What do you do now and how long have you been cooking?

I’m a restaurant assistant manager at a USA franchise buffet and grill located in Harrisonburg, VA. Cooking is my passion since I was really young. I grew up in big family with parents involved in food business. I was busy helping my mother to cook in the kitchen for her business and my father to sell produce at pasar/traditional farmers market. After I moved to the US, my passion for cooking becomes more serious. I started to work in the kitchen as a dishwasher, line cook, server, grill cook, to Assistant Manager. And finally I started blogging about the foods recipe at http://www.riceandcoconut.com in 2011, along with food photography. I love to share foods with family, friends, and neighbors.

My first experiences to cook for private party is a wedding for 100 plus people and recently I catered food for my friend’s bridal shower. They all rave about the foods, so I have a confidence that I can open a small business for broader community to share about my passion for food.

Is having your own food business your dream?

Yes, it is my dream to have a small food related business, catering or a small café, so I’m working on it.

Why café and not food truck?

I choose café because I want to create small intimate space with Indonesian décor like batik and batik mask with tropical feeling, so I can introduce Indonesian cultures with foods and the customers will enjoy the vibe while dining at BoBoKo. BoBoKo/rice basket will be used as a serving dish and will be on display as well.

Can you please tell us briefly how your café is going to run? (what food, when to launch, where to be, etc.)

BoBoKo: Indonesian Café is a casual restaurant serving Indonesian traditional and fusion foods. Right now we are working on the location, possibly downtown or strip mall in Harrisonburg, I hope I can open the door for business in January 2016.

What are the challenges in preparing the business plan?

Budgets, of course. Lots of $$$ and we have lot of work to do—also to find the right location.

We’re involved with local small business development center and business services provided by SBDC in what’s cooking program and they have been helpful to us.

How do you manage the pricing for the food you’re going to sell?

This is another benefit from the “What’s Cooking” program. Their speakers taught me a lot for the pricing process.

Do you think it’d be more difficult for you to open your own business had you not won the competition? (i.e. cost and expenses)

Yes, of course. We have to build our business concept without knowledge from scratch. Winning the competition has helped us to actually start. We use some vouchers we got from winning, but most of the expenses is on our own.

How do you manage the teamwork between you and your partner?

I think it is easier to do business with people that we know for a long time. One of us will be in charge in the back of the house and front of the house, but we do need more people to help us later.

What do you think about the market for Asian cuisines? (considering where you live now)

Harrisonburg is diverse in terms of for food and foodies, lots of ethnic restaurant here. As you know there is no Indonesian restaurant here yet, but if we think about target market I have to provide menu with “Indonesian fusion” although most foods are traditional Indonesian food.

Do you think it’s always good to work for someone else first then establish your own business? Or the other way around?

I think so because we’ll gain knowledge and experiences from the past employers and we need to know about restaurant business. I personally don’t think I can do this without experiences (that I’ve gained).

What do you expect to see in your business within the next couple of years?

It is hard to tell but I hope the business grows and runs very well. And I probably will have another conversation with you in the future about it. I just can’t wait to share Indonesian food with Harrisonburg community.

Takeaway points:

1. No matter where you are, you can always start a business.
2. If there’s a business plan competition, join and win prizes to execute the plan.
3. No matter how old you are, you can always start a business.
4. Find a partner that you’ve known for a long time. Not necessarily a family member, just someone you trust so well to work with you through thick and thin.
5. No matter what you do now and how long you’ve been doing that, you can always start a business. Got experience? Good. Not enough experience? Learn as you go
6. As long as you do it all with passion, you won’t give up and there will be a point where you succeed. Trust me. After all, that’s what happens with all the successful entrepreneurs, right?

A lil’ quote for us.